"Maybe I should have stayed in bed today."
This was a thought that tumbled around in my head for most of the morning. Who knew this would be the day I would receive my first terrible book review. It was bound to happen. I even tried to prepare myself, but just like labor pains, you get knocked on your backside.
I'm a pretty sensitive person. I like to be liked. Who doesn't? But I've learned that to make it in the writing world you have to grow some thick skin. Today was the first slice I've endured since I stopped adding rejection letters to my pile back in June.
It hurts. Rejection always does. But it's a part of life. It teaches you not only how to be humble but also reminds you that there's always something more to learn. If I ever reach the point where I think I'm God's gift to writers I give you permission to slap me!
So today has been a tad rocky for me. I knew my heart wouldn't be into writing, as I licked my wounds, so I switched gears and did some marketing. What better way to deal with rejection than to get another sale?
I've also done some more tweaking to my blog. Watcha think? Kinda nice, eh? Much better than the dreary black and gray.
How do you handle yet another rejection letter, bad review or naysayer?
Are you a fighter or do you give up? I think I might hear the Rocky music floating thought the air!
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
A friend of mine, Danielle Bannister author of Pulled, wrote a blog this morning that made me chuckle. It was about the perceptions that many people have of writers. To be honest, I had some of those myself until I actually became an author.
First off: Writing in your Pj's.
Heck yeah I do that! Wouldn't you? They're comfy, forgiving on overindulgence and just about my favorite type of clothing to wear. Come on...be honest. If you had the option of putting on those heels and a dress to head out to the office or staying home and working in Pj's, wouldn't you choose comfort clothes hands down?
What do you think I'm wearing right now? Ha Ha!
Second: Pacing while wrestling with your muse.
Hmmm...this was an image I had when I was younger. I used to picture a man sunk low in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose as he mentally slammed his head against a brick wall. To be honest, I'm sure this is true for many people. Thankfully I've really never experienced this. Ideas come easily to me. BUT...anytime I try to set a goal date to finish, things screech to a halt. Not because the ideas fled, but because life seems to pile up around me, screaming for attention.
Third: A room filled with crumpled papers with scrawled notes written in haste that are tossed aside.
In the virtual word this is no longer a sustainable visual image. Although I do have some friends who still prefer a good old pen and paper. For me, it's a delete key and a computer trash can. Or a massive file of odds and ends that I'm convinced will help me at some point during my career.
Fourth: Writing a big hit must be easy since my library is full of books.
If this is real, someone please tell me how! To be honest, maybe 1% of all writers actually land a publishing contract, and even that doesn't mean instant success. Have you ever read the stories behind your favorite authors? How many of them managed to land that amazing book deal on their first attempt. *Forget about Stephenie Meyer. That's not normal!*
Some of the best authors today fight for years to find an agent. Did you catch the key word? It's not years it's fight. They didn't give in to the countless rejections. They pushed through, persevered and improved their writing skills during that time.
People think "hey, I could be a writer" without ever truly understanding how intense it can be. Writing a book is not an easy thing to do and getting it published the traditional way is nearly impossible unless you can show you have supporters or you are willing to let the stack of rejection letters mount high while waiting for that yes.
Fifth: I'm gonna make it big, sell millions of copies and retire to the Bahamas.
Sounds great doesn't it? Sure it does. It's certainly something I wouldn't snub my nose at. But it's not as easy as it sounds.
Want a glimpse into my life as an author? I spend a couple hours every day blogging, posting on my author page on Facebook, checking Linked In, emailing, responding to comments and checking book sales. And that's only online.
That doesn't include phone calls, appointments, scheduling author meet and greets, passing out flyers, designing marketing items, talking to businesses about selling my book, typing letters to libraries to see if they would include my book, keeping up with the market or talking to people one on one about what I do for a living.
Have I mentioned anything yet about writing the actual books?
What about rough drafts, editing, creating book covers, formatting ebooks, drafting print on demand files or storing away ideas for future books?
Still think it's easy to be an author?
BUT...there's always a but. For you to be successful with anything you do, you have to enjoy spending the time it takes to reach that level of success. Spending 6 hours a day behind my laptop creating quirky characters is the best and only job I could ever truly do. It's my passion...my obsession some might say.
It's what gets me out of bed each morning. Why? For love of the written word? Yes...but it's more than that. I write not just for myself, or for my readers, but for my family.
I write for my husband. He puts a lot of his time and effort into helping me succeed with my dream and I want to give back to him. For my son, because he gives me the inspiration I need to be the best writer I can. For my extended family who have supported me through every agonizing step of my journey so far. For my mother, whom I know would have been proud of me if she were still alive.
These people are the ones that motivate me. That keep me pushing on even when I want to curl up in the corner and cry because I don't think I can do it all. I'm not perfect, and to be honest, I've got a lot of growing as an author before I can consider myself to be "good" but I'm excited to learn something new with each day that passes.
So, how have your perceptions of the writing field changed? Or have they?
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Every writer I have ever met could be considered quirky. I say that with love of course since I happily add myself to that category. We're different...set apart from the mundane world that many people are simply happy gliding through. But not us. We're driven to be something different...to make the world a better place through words.
For a painter: It's the longing to see brilliant colors splashed across a blank canvas. For a musician: It's the skillfully mastered piece that makes even the angels in heaven smile. For the chef among us: It's the wafting smells that entice our stomachs to take a tiny bite of perfection. For writers: It's the opportunity to sweep your reader into a fantasy world where reality doesn't have to be quite so brutally black and white. We live for that next life changing novel that so beautifully enraptures us that it's painful to say goodbye to your beloved characters.
We writers are unique. We are passionate. We are talented but more than that we have a voice that we are driven to share with the world. Sure most of us will never become a household name...but that's ok. We don't write just for recognition. We write because we must. Because we will burst if we can't pour out our souls onto the page. We have something to say...and that gives us purpose in life.
So what drives you?
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This is an area that I greatly struggle with. Some people that I speak to enjoy writing and do so as a once in a while hobby. But for me it's a need, an addiction akin to the likes of some of the best drugs on the market. I've always been like that...whether reading or writing. I live to create a new world in my mind. But reality tells us that life must go on.
So how do we gain perspective in our lives? How do we set goals that enable us to achieve everything necessary to keep our lives in order? Set mini goals.
For me, as a housewife and stay at home mom, my "job" is to take care of the house and be with my son. I can't do that too well when I'm focused on a computer screen all day long. So how do I manage to make it all work? Well, to be perfectly honest, some days are worse than others. I do have a tendency to push aside necessary chores in order to get that last bit of inspiration typed out. It's a flaw...sigh...but something I am working on.
My goal for each day is to try to have my house at least look respectable in case visitors were to drop in unannounced. No it's not always to my husbands standards, which I know is an area that I need work on, but I do my best. So I set aside strict times in which I can write. When my son's at school or in the evenings when my family has gone to bed. I set aside "me" time for writing. That way my life can proceed as planned and everyone wins.
So how about you? How do you fit it all in to your busy day?
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